My dad used to say, “Do as I say, not as I do.” I knew what he meant. He knew his shortcomings and didn’t want me to follow in those footsteps of his. He wanted better for me.
Yet the reality is that in parenting, more is caught than taught. Both the good and the bad. Queue Harry Chapin’s, “Cats In The Cradle.”
That’s why it’s vital that you give your child a clear example to follow.
Ever had one of those mornings when, after pushing the snooze button several times, you jumped out of bed, quickly showered, dressed, and then realized you’d forgotten something extremely important? Perhaps you forgot to shave, or brush your teeth, or even—heaven forbid—your phone as you rushed out the door?
Days like those remind us that a specific morning routine helps our days flow much smoother. A solid morning routine not only streamlines our start, but also sets the tone for our day.
I recently found out a dear, old friend passed away. I had called to wish him a happy birthday. His wife told me the news—he had passed away two years ago.
Courtesy Flickr/Jeremy Austin
Yep. Are you cringing like I did? Honestly, I couldn’t tell which was greater: my shock or my embarrassment.
It’s amazing how we can so easily neglect our most valued priorities. Case in point: communication between spouses. We all know how important it is. It’s what keeps us close and our relationship growing.
But there’s nothing like the busyness of everyday life to reduce our communication to nothing except the functional necessities.
A simple, 15-30 minute daily routine can counter that tendency and keep you and your spouse updated and feeling connected.
In our world where so many things call for our time and attention, setting priorities is key to a satisfying life. We’ve all experienced those days when, as we lay our head on the pillow, we wonder, “What on earth did I do all day long?”, regretting all the things we didn’t get done.
Such is the life of a busy mom. But it can be better. No matter how many unexpecteds come up, we can make the most of the 24 hours a day we all have and accomplish the most important things for that day.
As parents, we are constantly talking to our kids. Maybe I should say “telling”. Telling them what to do, what not to do, what they should have done, how to do something or do it better. They hear from us—a lot.
It’s a big part of our job description as parents: instruction. Got to have it. Yet there’s another vital aspect of our communication that your child shouldn’t have to do without. It’s telling him how you feel about him, especially that you love him and are proud of him.
I would do anything short of sin to make life better for my kids. One day, twenty-five years ago, when my kids were young I realized that the best thing I could do for them wasn’t to make more money or buy a bigger house—it was to provide them with the best version of me.
That was going to take some work. I wasn’t a bad person, yet I was acutely aware of my shortcomings. I’d hoped I would have simply grown out of them. But I knew in reality it was going to take some real work on my part.
During the years when life flew by with nary a second thought, I had to force myself to stop and take stock of what I was doing with my time. Often I was so busy that I couldn’t see the forest for the trees. I found it essential every so often to take a look from 50,000 feet up to gain perspective on how I was using my time.
Courtesy galleryhip.com
As a mom of five wonderful children under seven years old, I found myself inundated with things pulling for my attention—five little ones, the doorbell, the laundry, the phone. At any point in time, I felt that I had to choose between a minimum of eight to ten things—all urgent. Add that to the fact that my husband was a perfectionist (though he loosened up) and it was literally a recipe for disaster.
One of the many Andersen-clan quotes comes from the original Star Wars. In the battle to destroy the Deathstar, a fighter pilot is nearing the drop point yet is feeling the pressure to abort. Understandable. Darth Vader is bearing down on him—I hate when that happens. But the commander calmly yet firmly issues the order, “Stay on target. Stay on target!”
Most couples say they wish they had more time together. We genuinely want a greater sense of closeness. We fantasize about having the hours-long fun times together like when first dating.
Courtesy Flickr/Mark Fosh
Yet life gets busy quick. Earning a living. Establishing a home. When kids come into the picture, busyness goes logarithmic!
