Kirby Andersen

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Friday, September 09, 2016

The Rewards Of Investing In Marriage Just Keep Coming

Bonjour, Paris!

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By the time this post gets published, Gail and I will have landed in Paris, France for a week that has been a long time coming!

Paris

I’ve tried to get Gail to travel to Paris—or anywhere overseas—all of our 37 years together. I’ll let her tell you below about her change of heart. But there is one lesson in this I’d like to highlight:

Happy empty nesters are relationship investors!

Kirby Andersen

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Financial investing certainly helps as well. But it’s more important to be consistently investing into the marriage relationship. And not just the first few years, but year after year after year.

This trip to Paris is the reward of our investments into our relationship so far. And it’s part of our continuing investment strategy.

Over the next week, we invite you to follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. I even heard something about me being a guest on Gail’s Periscope broadcast, Mentoring Moments For Moms!

Gail’s Side Of This Story—In Her Own Words

I am a homebody. I love my routine. I feel safe and secure when I am in my own surroundings. I love to sleep in my own bed and eat foods I am used to. It’s just part of my “slow to warm up” personality and I’ve grown accustomed to it.

But my husband loves to travel. He wants to see the world and have me by his side. For years, we’ve struggled between where to travel and for how long.

Every time we’d be planning a get-away together, my comments were, “I just want to stay in the United States,” and “I can only do 10 days at the most.”

Somehow, I had convinced myself that I’d only feel comfortable if I could easily communicate with the locals and would be able to find food I am accustomed to.

A Simple Contest Changed My Life

But last year, I got a phone call from my daughter that changed all that. She wanted to enter a contest for a free trip to Paris for two and wanted to take me along with her when she won it.

Now, if there were ever a place I desired to visit overseas, Paris was it. I had studied French in high school, and I loved the French history and culture. When she asked me, I said, “Sure I’d go!” Honestly, I doubted she would win, but I put it in God’s hands. If I was really supposed to stretch out of my comfort zone, she would wind up winning the contest.

I truly was shocked when out of 85,491 entrants, my daughter was indeed chosen as the winner. For 7 months, I brushed up on my French, made plans, and purchased a specific wardrobe for the trip.

But I still struggled with the uncertainty of it all. And hearing the reports of others who had traveled overseas made it no better. Delayed flights, lost luggage, stern questions by border patrol, getting sick, stolen cell phones, missing a stop on the Metro, not adjusting to the time change—all these and more plagued my mind.

Fortunately, the details of the trip were all being taken care of by Fat Tire Tours, the tour company that awarded it. So at least we didn’t have to figure out where to go and which places to visit. Those fears were quieted.

I went in faith, believing that God would go before us and cause us to have an experience without incident.

Our trip was everything I had asked for, and more. Not only did we feel well taken care of on our tours, but the entire staff of Fat Tire Tours went above and beyond to assist us in navigating anything else we had questions on. Where to go for dinner, how to do the Metro, best deals on tickets, using the rental bikes, whatever we needed. Having their office as our home base made the trip as easy for me as a stint in the US.

I literally cried when we left Paris. It was the trip of a lifetime.

But It Got Even Better!

Once home, I could not wait to travel back to Paris. In fact, within a month, my husband surprised me and purchased discounted tickets for a return trip for the two of us. Getting to go together was now a dream for both of us.

I still hear stories from others about their mishaps while traveling overseas, yet no one can dissuade me from wanting to go back. After that first trip, I now realize that any little inconveniences along the way are minuscule compared to the thrill of seeing and experiencing another country.

So now, when my husband says, “Let’s go on a trip,” I simply respond, “OK! Where to?”

Question: How do you make sure you and your spouse consistently invest in your marriage relationship? Share your answer in the comments below.

Filed Under: Marriage

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I am a family man. I love and am deeply committed to my family—to become the best I can be for them. And I'm committed to you and your family. Nothing gives me greater pleasure than to help others reach for their full potential and hit the mark for which they were created.

I live to help others become better versions of themselves at home and work—to not only weather life’s challenges and positively impact their world, but to raise their children to do the same. In short, to live better, love more, and leave a legacy.

I now write, speak, and coach full-time. I am married and have three sons and two daughters.

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