Every presidential election is a big deal. Some are bigger than others—this is one of them.
I’m not super excited about the candidates but I haven’t been for the last few elections. I miss that—it’s nice to be really excited about a candidate.
If you’re genuinely interested in building great relationships with others—personally or in business—you must be motivated out of a desire to serve others. Yet even with the most sincere of motives, there’s a danger of making promises that you can’t—or just don’t—keep.
And nobody likes a broken promise.
This post is a bit of a deviation from my norm. Not directly about parenting, marriage, personal development, or health. Yet I believe it’s a subject that will very definitely impact our families and communities. I want to challenge you to show some extraordinary support to our police—the men and women in blue.
We’ve had a bad run of news lately. Outrageous acts of violence throughout communities in our country. Accusations of police brutality—some unfortunately valid; others proven false.
Each day is filled with interactions with many different people. Some we choose such as with friends and family. Others are out of necessity due to our jobs—dealing with customers, guests, clients.
Too much of the time, most complain about the latter. Especially if you’re in “customer service”—which most of us are to some degree. And that means serving others in some way and often having to solve their problems.
One of the greatest interpersonal skills a person can master is the ability to learn and use the names of others. For years now, I’ve trained volunteers and staff to learn a person’s name and use it often to gain a greater chance to influence them for good.
You may say you’re not good at remembering names. You may hate having to wear name tags at an event. But you cannot deny how good it feels when someone remembers and calls you by your name.
I’ve been in the customer service business all my adult life. Pastoring growing churches. Creating great experiences at summer camp. Hosting seminars, conferences, and retreats. No matter what the organization or event, it’s all about people. Creating an experience that not only adds value to people but makes them want to continue their relationship with you.
I’ve learned a thing or two about creating such experiences and building lasting relationships. There are several “power principles” I teach pastors, event organizers, volunteer team leaders, and parents that make huge differences in their culture. The first of which is the power of a smile.
Guys, first of all—none of your wives paid me to write this. Although I suspect I’m going to make them grateful with this simple suggestion to you today.
But my main motivation is to help you and your marriage with something that has helped me and my marriage. It’s simple to understand yet it will take some doing to make it a habit.
Most dream of being financially successful. Many will say things like, “I’d do anything to be that guy!” But would you? Because chances are, “that guy”, worked hard in the past—and most likely does so now—to enjoy what he has today.
In the same way, it’s easy to rationalize why we haven’t succeeded financially like we wish we had. Not being good in school. Not having grown up in the right family or community. Not knowing the right people.
Those who enjoy a fulfilling marriage know it’s tough to overestimate its importance for overall success and happiness. And that includes financial success.
That’s what the research of Thomas Stanley showed after surveying 733 millionaires. Considering a supportive spouse as very important for economic success was #4 on their list.
Sir Isaac Newton once said, “Tact is making a point without making an enemy.” Most of us have worked hard to make a point yet only to stir up an argument or damage a relationship in the process.
One of the best skills I learned years ago at a marriage workshop was how to speak “I” language. It’s a language that’s easy to understand but it takes some effort to become proficient because it’s so counter-intuitive.
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